I Laughed Until I Peed
I thought us American’s should provide this toy to any teenagers who are even THINKING of the horizontal cha cha.
Vote: Best Humor Blog
Hey everyone! Vote for me on Blogger’s choice award. So I can make back my millions. That I lost this week.
The Day of Atonement
So, as Jews, versus Catholics, we get it pretty good: only one day to beg forgiveness for our sins versus that weekly thing. As I sit here, and try to be spiritual and contemplate my many vices, (blogging instead of praying may actually be one of them), I decided to create a little poll, in honor of G-d, as sort of a short cut to listing out my sins. And asking forgiveness. From the Universe. Maybe this year will be different.
Hacking cough? Stay THE FUCK home.
Sitting in a cube? Bad. People having meetings hanging onto the cube wall and talking loudly to the person in the adjacent cube? Worse. People sitting IN the adjacent cube with a HACKING COUGH for 2 weeks? Intolerable! Sore throat? Priceless. Now I get a sick day.
If this is what I can see…
Yikes. So I was just minding my own darn business and checking the ol’ email, when I look up and see this:
And I’m like, “oh shit, if this is what I can see…” Yep, I guess they can see me too. In the bathroom, and other various and sundry places where I might not be in what would be called a complete state of dress. And so, the decision has to be made, sneaking around with the shades down, or, or, um or, undressing under my covers. Not a great way to start the day. Well, for you maybe!
Are you friggin’ kidding me??
If I were the violent type, I might be inclined to pick up my shot gun and do some damage when this racket started outside my apartment early this Saturday AM. But alas, I’m not, so I called 311 and filed a noise complaint with the great old New York City Department of complaints. Do you know where that goes? Yep, exactly where this blog gets me. That and $5 will buy ya a cup of coffee (at least in New York, but if Obama wins, maybe he can do something about the rising costs of Starbucks)
If I were the violent type from Lara Dean on Vimeo.
I’m so confused.
So, once again, I watch the debates. Each with valid points. So, I ask you internet, to vote. Help me choose.