Jon & Kate Divorce and 9 other reasons I am glad it’s Tuesday

Random thoughts for the day:

1) Thank the Lord almighty that Kate and Jon are finally friggin’ getting divorced. I am SICK of their whining. It’s worse than mine.

2) Ok, so she thwacked her kid on the bottom. She’s got 8, the kid was blowing a whistle and wouldn’t stop and NOW, she’s doing it alone. Was it child abuse? I got spanked a plenty and I think I’m OK (maybe not) and frankly, please tell me when time out works except on Nanny 911?

3) So today I left one bag of groceries in the food store, went back for it a 10PM tonight and crossing the street at 31st and 3rd, some asshole drunkard threw a bottle of water out his truck window at me and this other chick next to me and soaked us both. Jeez Louise. It’s not like the Mets won or anything.

4) Bella is sick AGAIN, or still after 3 weeks of ear infection, sinus infection and now… now that I am on vacation for a week, 102 fever. Nice.

5) Thank GOD Weather.com was wrong and it didn’t THUNDER STORM today. I sat outside in between the scatter raindrops.

6) But twitter it did. Is anyone else confused by the need to tweet?

7) Why in God’s name would anyone want to get married in a weightless situation? I mean, think of the vomit all down her dress? And I thought cake was bad.

8) Thursday was my birthday. As a resolution I am trying not to curse. I heard our waitress say it and it really sounded crass. But, then again, does everyone look so shitty when blowing out candles? I can say that, can’t I?

9) I joined another dating service. Here are my choices. Why do i bother? Oh yeah, I know what you’re going to say, “hey Lara, have you looked at YOURSELF lately??”

10) And mostly, the main reason I’m glad it’s Tuesday? So I don’t have to repeat Monday again. THAT’S why I’m glad it’s Tuesday.