Help. Save me. I am a Bachelorholic.

Please. Someone. Save me from tonight. I can’t stop it. I hate him. Hate Jason. But even more, I hate ABC. For playing me. I am sure, sure that this is NOT human drama, but television drama. In disguise of a reality TV Show. A show that portrays the REAL love triangle of Jason, Melissa and Molly. And I watched the finale. Then the rose ceremony. And then? Yes, I did. I tried to stop but I WATCHED JIMMY KIMMEL (who admitted he was Italian and I thought he was a nice Jewish boy.) And there he was again. Arghhhh. Jason. So please, please do something. Get me to stop. I can not watch, AFTER THE ROSE PART II. I may get sick.