February 17th

Hot Jewish Women

I resent the fact that when you Google HOT WOMEN, not ONE of the 15 million results show Hot Jewish Women. What kind of prejudice is that? I mean, every other type of woman has their own hot site: Hot Russian Brides, Hot Brazilian Women, Hot Japanese Woman, Hot SPORTY Women (really???), Hot Gymnastic Women, Hot STAR TREK Woman (STAR TREK??), Hot Knocked Up Women, Hot Women Playing their drums, Hot Women Belly Dancing, Hot Women in a Hot Mess, Hot PREGNANT women, Hot Spartans, Hot Korean Women, Hot Tempered Women, Hot Women Dancing, Hot Black African Girls, Hot Latina Women. Even the 15th results page, when Hot Flashes starting coming up, I knew there was a problem. So I double searched: Hot Jewish Women and the closest thing that came up in that search was Jacob Richman’s Hot Sites for a Jewish Shiduch (match) http://www.jr.co.il/hotsites/j-dating.htm. It can’t be possible that Star Trek Women ARE hotter than Jewish women…can it? Wait a minute. Don’t answer that.

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For those single men who need a reason to understand why Jewish Women are among the Hottest Creatures on the planet, I have created a TOP TEN LIST: Jewish Women are hot because they:

1) Always Smell Good in the Summer: A Jewish woman will never, ever take a subway in the summer (or winter) so you will never, ever see her sweat.
2) Always Smell Good in the Winter: Most Jewish women, (grandmas excepted) make reservations rather than dinner. So they will never smell of fried oil or onions.
3) Have Own Mirror in Purse: So they don’t spend too much time in bathroom at said restaurant. Unless she wants to dump you. Then she stays in the bathroom all night.
4) Are Always Prepared: Never gets caught without credit card. Never ever offers to pay on a date.
5) Have Great Fathers. Have great cars. In Manhattan. Sometimes, will let you drive. Maybe. If you’ve paid for dinner. If not, says buh bye.
6) Have Tools on Hand: Carefully manicured nails make for great bottle openers in a pinch.
7) Have Smooth Skin in Winter: Had warm fur coats, so her skin would never get chapped from cold air. But now, belongs to PETA. Maybe. Or then again, maybe not.
8) Are Very Smart: Have high powered careers. Or maybe smarter. Marry high powered career men so they don’t need high powered careers.
9) Are Very Giving: Of headaches. But she will make it up to you in many ways. MANY ways. But carry Advil just in case…she doesn’t.

And that about sums it up. Oh wait, I said 10. I did say 10 didn’t I?

10) Would Never, Ever want a site about Hot Jewish Women, because she is so Hot, she doesn’t give a sh*t.

For more about hot Jewish Women, go to www.jdate.com and surf till your hearts content.
**On second thought, can it be possible that Star Trek Pregnant Sporty Russian Girls are hotter than Jewish women?

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