I must be insane…or just high…
…But like, I had to post this. So, two weeks ago, I quit a fairly comfortable, secure job (or so I thought) to start my own business. Like WHAT was I thinking? And actually, I wasn’t drunk. Maybe, just a little delusional. What do you think? Happy Friday?
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Bra police, or: Should you wear this on a sail boat?
So, yesterday I went sailing around the isle of Manhattan, no it ain’t Capri, but what ever, and this 50 foot sail boat had 40 people, so you could say it was a little…PACKED. And I show up in shorts and a tank and this is fine and dandy for sailboat attire, but I look around me and feel a little under dressed. ’cause most all the other ladies around me are well turned out in cute little sundresses. And I’m like, well at least …
Gym etiquette, or, for Godsakes, man!
To all you dudes that need to wear a big honking towel around your neck to keep the sweat from dripping off, please do NOT wear a shirt that exposes your pits when you are in a very small gym with equipment right on top of each other. Because if you sweat like a pig, guess what you smell like? (Except for the fact that I don’t really know what pigs smell like because I’ve never spent a single minute next to one, and I am making …
Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody
But clearly, she does. Is it me, or does a cab work just as well? “So what?” says Bella. “Maybe she thought it would be fun.” And I’m like. Yup. She probably does.
And you think……
THE talk…with Bella
So tonight we had “the talk” (or a semblance of one or whatever appears to be one in 2009– somewhat different than the ones that I had with my mother in the ’70’s) and here’s how it went.
BELLA: So it’s way more awkward for kids to talk about sex with your parents than the parents feel about talking to kids about sex.
ME: You feel AWKWARD, with ME? Like WHY? I talked about sex with MY mother.
BELLA: You did? Do I want to hear this?
ME: I don’t know do you?
BELLA: I guess.
ME: I …
The end of the world?
What happens if there’s no cell phones,
If Blackberries disappear,
If texting becomes extinct,
If no iPhones launch this year?
What happens if Facebook vanishes,
If Google goes away,
If the AIM man went a running,
If Yahoo went out to play?
What happens if all viruses
Were Just colds, or aches and flus?
Or if everyone who tweeted,
All share the exact same views?
What happens if suddenly,
All laptops start to freeze,
If all MACs had a heart attack,
If all PC hard drives seize?
What happens if forever,
Explorer vanishes from sight.
If Mozilla just stops working,
And Safari gives up the fight.
If your email no …
My wedding march if I ever get married again
So, over 7 million people watched this wedding march for a few simple reasons: 1) it made you laugh 2) it made you cry 3) we are all jealous 4) if you have a big wedding party, learn how to not bore your whole congregation to tears. Too bad everyone doesn’t send them a dollar as wedding gift. Hell 50 cents would do!