September 29th

Obama assassination poll

So today, the internet is abuzz with the fact that some dude (or dudette) posted an assassination poll on Facebook. And this guy is just oh so excited that he was the FIRST person to report it to the secret service and so continues to blither on and on about oh how thankful the secret service was that this poll was brought to their attention, folks.

“We worked with Facebook to take it down, and we are currently investigating the matter,” said Ed Donovan, a Secret Service spokesman in …

 
 
September 23rd

Hypochondria

So, those of you who know me and love me. Or hate me, also know that I am a level 10 hypocondriate (10 being highest on a scale of 1-10). And no one anywhere can convince me otherwise, because despite all my many hours of shrinkage, and despite all my the sage advise on how to get rid of colds and flus, I am the worst patient. Ever. Which brings me to Bella. She’s been staying at her dad’s house (one of the few times he comes in handy), because, well, she just IS. And now, because it’s that time …

 
 
September 16th

Naturally thin

So, The Learning Annex has this class called: “how to be naturally thin”, but it’s like if I were NATURALLY THIN I wouldn’t have to be on fucking Weight Watchers would I? I mean doesn’t NATURALLY THIN mean that you don’t have to do ANYTHING to be thin because you are NATURALLY thin? Meaning, I wouldn’t have to take a class to learn how to be naturally thin, because it’s natural. Like, if you are a NATURAL BLOND, you don’t have to die your hair. …

 
 
September 14th

The time of his life…

So, after watching this non-embeddable YOUTUBE video over and over, the tears streaming down my face, I will say it’s hard to believe that this hunky, talented guy has gone to the here after. It’s unlikely that a sexier, hotter, more memorable dance scene will ever be filmed in my lifetime. And if it does, I do believe it will be Patrick choreographing it from above.

And I am sure, part of the reason I’m still single, is because Johnny Castle never walked into my life. …

 
 
September 12th

Stopped feeling sorry for myself

But still sadly virtually socializing away. Found this. Laughed. Then cried cause I’m still on the God Damn computer.

Auto Tuning from Casey Donahue on Vimeo.

 
 
September 12th

It’s Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody…

Oh, I could lie about this whole thing and say that my boyfriend is out of town, but um, well that would be a lie and why lie to the internet? Not the same kind of joy as lying to your MOTHER about being a virgin, right? But anyway, since even Chloe didn’t want to be dragged along, I went out by meself, downed a Third Avenue Special Shrimp Tempura Wrapped in Spicy Tuna Roll and topped it off with coffee yogurt and coco chips from Berrywild, all the while checking my Blackberry like I …

 
 
September 11th

ALWAYS REMEMBER

I wrote this last year, but being out of creative juices, feel it’s just as applicable today as it was then, even if the only other person in my office now that I am self employed is a fuzzy black toy poodle

We always must remember,
Must never forget,
The day 2976 died,
By the fires of jets.

Today was different,
Then most other years,
Today only families,
Shed their tears.

My office was busy,
No one spoke of the day.
It was business as usual,
People went on their way.

No silence was observed,
As the names were read,
The TV chattered to an …

 
 
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