Laras lousy vacation: Day I
So, as CEO and acting president I decided the best thing to do for my newly formed company was for me to go on a vacation the second week on the job. I mean, don’t you? But for the first time ever, (well not ever, but almost) I couldn’t figure out who the hell to go with. Bella was like, “mom I’m bored whenever I go on vacation with you, I’m staying in the big dirty apple”. And others, “Lara, it’s just not a good week”, so I’m like, “f&ck it. I’m going alone.” And alone I go, 4 hours all …
How much are these jeans, or: being self employed is fantastic!
So, as most of you know (or many of you), last Monday marked my first day as an entrepreneur. That means, I now work for myself. A mid-sized corporation consisting of me, myself and I. And what better way grow that corporation, than to look big, act big and dress big. Which means, a short trip to Bergdorf Goodman.
After an hour of hunting around for some entrepreneurial bargains, and finding none to my satisfaction, I stumble upon, gladness of gladness, these jeans. 
And …
I must be insane…or just high…
…But like, I had to post this. So, two weeks ago, I quit a fairly comfortable, secure job (or so I thought) to start my own business. Like WHAT was I thinking? And actually, I wasn’t drunk. Maybe, just a little delusional. What do you think? Happy Friday?
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Bra police, or: Should you wear this on a sail boat?
So, yesterday I went sailing around the isle of Manhattan, no it ain’t Capri, but what ever, and this 50 foot sail boat had 40 people, so you could say it was a little…PACKED. And I show up in shorts and a tank and this is fine and dandy for sailboat attire, but I look around me and feel a little under dressed. ’cause most all the other ladies around me are well turned out in cute little sundresses. And I’m like, well at least …
Gym etiquette, or, for Godsakes, man!
To all you dudes that need to wear a big honking towel around your neck to keep the sweat from dripping off, please do NOT wear a shirt that exposes your pits when you are in a very small gym with equipment right on top of each other. Because if you sweat like a pig, guess what you smell like? (Except for the fact that I don’t really know what pigs smell like because I’ve never spent a single minute next to one, and I am making …
Saturday night and I ain’t got nobody
But clearly, she does. Is it me, or does a cab work just as well? “So what?” says Bella. “Maybe she thought it would be fun.” And I’m like. Yup. She probably does.
And you think……
THE talk…with Bella
So tonight we had “the talk” (or a semblance of one or whatever appears to be one in 2009– somewhat different than the ones that I had with my mother in the ’70’s) and here’s how it went.
BELLA: So it’s way more awkward for kids to talk about sex with your parents than the parents feel about talking to kids about sex.
ME: You feel AWKWARD, with ME? Like WHY? I talked about sex with MY mother.
BELLA: You did? Do I want to hear this?
ME: I don’t know do you?
BELLA: I guess.
ME: I …