Death of a Cell Phone (aka–I HATE Verizon Wireless)
I hate Verizon. Yes. I do. I do indeed. In January 2007 I sadly buried my 7 year-old-StarTAC. Does anyone remember them? Anyone here OLD enough to remember them? And it was the time when cell phones were used, for GUESS WHAT??? MAKING PHONE CALLS. And they lasted. And lasted. And lasted.
But anyhow, back to Verizon. So, I’m finally forced to break down and buy a friggin’ MOTOKRZR (that the sales person told me was the …
The Attack of the Vacuum Monster
This, perhaps, is the only reason to ever pick up a vacuum. That and mile high dust bunnies.
Untitled from Lara Dean on Vimeo.
Water Taxi Beach
What the hell to do on this beautiful Sunday in the dog days of summer? I know…what an awesome idea… WATER TAXI BEACH . It looks great on the NY Waterways website, and hey, you get a fantastic water taxi ride to boot. So, for the low, low price of $10 a head round trip (yes, I dragged Bella with me), we could experience a water journey, a beach, THE WATER, VIEWS and more….much more. Like:
The …
Haircut Day
No one really likes to get a haircut. Or a bath. But these two say it all. Without nary a word.
Jayseus. How long does someone have to wait these days for a wash and trim?
He is SUCH a pain in the ARSE. Complaining doesn’t make it happen any faster. It’s like New York, ya know? Might as well just relax and take it easy.
Chain Mail: I am still waiting
To all my friends who in the last year sent me best ‘wishes’, chain letters, ‘angel’ letters or other promises of good luck if I forwarded something, NONE OF THAT SHIT WORKED! From now on, could you please just send money, Vodka, chocolate, movie tickets or gasoline vouchers and airline tickets instead. And I promise, I will NOT be forwarding any of that to 10 friends.
The Elevator, Part III: Her View My View
So, I happen to live in a building where everyone is much younger than I am. MUCH. But older than Bella. I just can’t help getting annoyed every time I go into the ‘vator and there they are, clear skin, bright eyes, long hair, hot guys. POPPING THEIR GUM. It drives me nuts. So, in we go. There are 3. Two guys, one girl. You know, the kind with the Flat Ironed look. And one guy popping and popping. They leave 7 floors below my stop. The popper gets …