Oprah’s Detox Diet: Lara’s Journey, Day I
So last month Oprah announced she was going on a Vegan Detox diet, and I thought why the fuck not? I mean, if Oprah can do it, (and I am not as much as a food addict as she is) why can’t I? A few years back I went on a similar (but not Vegan) diet for 2 months and I felt AWESOME. So, I am blogging about day one. Mine’s a little modified– I’m thinking I’ll do OK with no wheat, no sugar, no alcohol– after all that birthday binging on Wednesday.
MORNING: My …
Submit Your Bitch: Week I
Thanks everyone for SUBMITTING YOUR BITCH. It just goes to show me, that your lives are just as lousy as mine. Since results were overwhelming, I’ve picked the best ones for you to vote on. That luck winner will receive a $25 Gift Certificate to do with what they want. Like, um…well, get some extra Prozac? Well, whatever. Winners will be announced next Friday. And if YOU have a bitch (well, who doesn’t) email me to enter. Lara at laraslousylife.com
I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE TELL ME I DON’T HAVE TO DIET. I am trying to lose 30 pounds, and my …
It’s Not How You Slice The Cake…
…it’s how many pieces you can get out of it. So today was my birthday, and there was a big old surprise German Chocolate cake, and you know how I despise chocolate. But anyway, there was a HUGE group of people for this well, large, but not large enough cake. (It’s not that I’m that popular, it’s just that when there’s cake, there’s a crowd because people at my office are so tired of eating, living and breathing health food all day long, that they are like …
Skateboard Boy
So today, Chloe and I were just drinking our morning java and minding our own business at the local outdoor cafe, when along comes this loud, obnoxious skate board dude. Well Chloe was in obvious agreement with me because all 10 pounds of her body lunged at him, showing him who was boss, Goddammit. He nearly fell off his skateboard, which gladdened me, because that noise scared the crap out of me while I was trying to soak up all the important daily happenings on my …
OCD may NOT be hereditary
Now, I generally do not hunt the internet for flushing cats, cats who have OCD, or people who have high water bills, but somehow, through the magic of the wonderful world wide web, I found this cat, that indeed may need his dose of Lexipro or a visit to the Cat Whisperer.
via videosift.com
Father’s Day
It’s been five years since you disappeared,
Stole my heart, took my tears.
You left our lives that Father’s Day,
Closed your eyes and flew away.
I felt the breath get knocked from me,
Felt the pain intolerably.
I never thought I’d laugh again,
Breath, feel, or live again.
But something happened over time,
It’s still not perfect, still not fine.
While the red of hurt is now shades of gray,
How wish you could have stayed.
I know you’re somewhere looking down,
Or up or sideways, oh heck, you’re just AROUND!
‘Cause I don’t know where heaven exists,
But know this Dad, you’re so …